we’re moving to Texas!
gosh, where to even begin?! first off, thank you for your love and prayers as we approach this new adventure - we are so grateful and can truly sense the grace from your prayers surrounding us!
there have been SO many beautiful moments over the course of the past 3 months - moments that have ultimately led us to make the decision to move our family across the country - out of a state we thought we’d always call home and to a state we thought we’d only ever visit. give God permission to surprise you and He will!
a lot of the reason i want to share the ins and outs of the past 3 months in particular is 1. to remember always the intricate and detailed ways in which God led us to this big decision, and 2. because i’ve been sitting with this verse in particular: “many believed in Him because of the woman’s testimony…” [John 4:39] God has truly done so much work in our lives both as individuals and together in marriage, and this decision is ultimately fruit born from God’s role in our lives. our hope and prayer in sharing the nitty gritty details, the intricacies and ins and outs of it all, is that you may be reminded that wherever you’re at - in the depths of the hard or standing on the stunning mountaintops that life can be - He is with you, there too - wanting to lead you every step of the way.
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last year in April, two of our dear friends here in CO got engaged. [shoutout to Conrad and Alexandra Neyrey, heyyyoooo!] Matt, Cal and i attended their engagement party together. as we settled into the party, Matt and i stood gathering snacks for ourselves and Cal around the dinner table. a beautiful spread of charcuterie covered the entire length of it. for as many people as there were in the house, it was just me, Matt, Cal and another couple that stood around the table.
we politely said hello, introduced ourselves, and officially met Jamie and Eric. us wives got to talking…“Shalini?!” Jamie, excitedly said. “that’s not a name you hear often! are you by chance a writer for blessed is she?!” i smiled slowly as nostalgia rushed forward. “i used to be, yes.” i said in response. [a story for another time - i wrote for blessed is she while in law school until 2020ish. i stepped away to focus on growing Pray. Train. Grow. and at the time Jamie and i met last year, i’d been feeling the nudge to return. the connection Jamie made and externalized was the catalyst i needed to re-join the blessed is she team, crazy how God works!] from there, our conversation continued - we talked about everything… you know when you meet people for the first time and you just know they’re going to be a part of your life for a long time - that’s how it felt that night. the hang up? they lived in Dallas.
my parents moved to the Dallas area summer of 2022. i’d mentioned that to Jamie and Eric - that when we were in town visiting, we’d connect and have a date night out.
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Matt and i have been praying for years over the course of our marriage to find “our people.” a community of people that share our desire for holiness, for growth, for eternity! a community of people to do daily life with, to watch sporting events with, to pray with and for, to raise families with, to sit around a crowded table with, to walk through the valleys and to the heights with. we’ve found some of “our people” here in Denver, but are so geographically spread out to the point that doing “daily life” with one another isn’t an option.
i’ve said to Matt a lot throughout our almost 7 years of marriage - “where do you think all of our people are?” as we continued to pray big prayers that eventually, God would bring us to them, or us to them, or both.
as we prepare to move, i recognize the hand of the Lord in each of our married years. we’ve seen the lowest of lows in our marriage, together. we’ve struggled through addiction, miscarriage, infertility, and an endometriosis diagnosis. and in these years of struggle, God invited us to meet Him in brand new ways. it wasn’t time to be a part of the type of community we desired. Matt and i needed to heal, first. we needed to pour into ourselves, our marriage, our nuclear family life - and ultimately - into the Heart of our Lord. it’s as if we were a little seed planted beneath the surface of the soil - sitting in what felt like a lot of darkness and stillness. the hard grueling season that seasons of waiting can be. and now, it feels like both as individuals and as a married couple and as a nuclear family - it is time to bloom.
we see with clarity: all of what is happening now has been years in the making. the learning. stretching. leaning in to Him. growing. healing. and now, blooming…
i’m reminded of the verse: “for everything there is a season…” [Ecclesiastes 3:1-8] and gosh, it’s t r u e.
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fast forward to March of this year. Matt, Cal and i boarded a plane to Texas for spring break. we’d visited my parents a handful of times since their move and swore we’d N E V E R move to Texas. jokes on us!
during our spring break trip, we had a blast. we visited the botanical gardens, ate delicious food, spent time at the pool - it was lovely. we met up with Jamie and Eric, had dinner with them a year after we’d met them and chatted for 4 hours straight, closing the restaurant down. we had the opportunity to meet up with one of my former NET sisters, Carissa, and her boys at the aquarium, too. i was in awe of the way Jamie, Eric and Carissa described their friendships and day to day lives. nothing and nowhere on earth is perfect, we know this because we were made for Heaven. yet as they shared about “their people,” it’s as if my heart shook from within. “pay attention,” i felt God speak gently to my soul. and so, i did.
on a practical note, i was on a Zillow kick while we were in Texas. one of my favorite things to do when we’re in different states is to Zillow the surrounding areas just to see what real estate looks like. we’d drive through a new town to get to the zoo or botanical gardens or church and i’d Zillow the houses nearby. WOAH, i said out loud on multiple occasions.
something we’ve always known is that we desire a home in which we’re able to host in. to have the space to entertain - both indoor and outdoor. to have a home that Callan can someday bring her friends to to hangout. we desire to create a peaceful space to come to - whether we’re hosting our friends, NET missionaries, our dear family, Cal’s future friends + their families, etc.
with that said, between our desire for close-knit Catholic community and all of that ^ we knew LOCATION mattered. the thing is, to live where we’d like to location-wise here in Colorado, we’d have to sacrifice square footage. and to have the square footage we desire, we’d have to sacrifice location. so, over the past few months, it’s become increasingly clear to us that [for as much as we LOVE Colorado], realistically speaking - Colorado couldn’t be home forever if we didn’t want to sacrifice one or the other. this realization caught us both by surprise. we’d never spent much time thinking about the practicalities of it all because sometimes - when you’re comfortable - it’s easiest to continue on going through the motions of the day-to-day without stepping back and really evaluating if you’re living consistently with the dreams that God has put on your heart.
as our week went on in March, i struggled, seemingly all of a sudden, with this underlying tension - one that beat just slightly under the surface, not caused or brought on by anything in particular that i could tell. the internal tension would arise and i’d mentally swat it away as i diverted my attention and heart elsewhere. finally, as the tension grew, i finally decided to surrender and sit with the discomfort…WHAT is this?! i asked God.
“will you let Me show you?” was His reply.
a timid “yes.” was mine.
on March 19th, St. Joseph’s Feast Day, Matt and i sat outside on my parents’ front porch. i’d come to realize that that underlying tension was a gentle nudge from Jesus to share with Matt the question i’d subconsciously been asking myself over the past few days…are we open to moving to Texas?
i took a deep breath, looked at Matt, and asked the question: “would you ever be open to moving to Texas?” he chuckled and shook his head: “no way!” was his response. “yeah, me either!” i said in reply. and then, a moment later - we looked back at each other right in the eyes and both realized that, yes - yes we were open. why wouldn’t we be?
it was as if time slowed in that moment of realizing that something we thought [and agreed that] we’d never be open to - we suddenly were. we sat outside in the silence, together. simply allowing this new sense of openness to envelope us. we’d both agreed that if God wanted us in Texas - He’d have to make it happen. that we’d walk through open doors, but He’d have to open them for us first.
and so, the adventure began…
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on March 30th, i began a beautiful Consecration to St. Joseph - diving deeper each day into who he was [is!]. desiring to understand more and more his deep and abiding desire to be obedient to the will of God because he BELIEVED that God was who He said He was. i was struck daily by St. Joseph’s humility, patience, and persistence. [you can find that book here if you’re curious!] OKAY St. Joseph, i prayed, teach me to cultivate the virtues you held in your life in my own life. teach me to be open and obedient to the will of God. teach me to be bold and brave and lean into what God desires for us!
the first week of April, Conrad and Alexandra got married. let’s goooooo! we had the opportunity to hang with Jamie + Eric again, as well as meet all of their Dallas friends at the wedding reception…we were all assigned to the same table that night! talk about the details with God. as we introduced ourselves to the couples at the table and began to chat, it felt like we sat at a table with old, true friends.
a few things that struck me: ALL of these couples did life together back in Dallas. they had active men’s and women’s groups. they all attended the same Church. they lived within range of each other…many of the things we’d be praying for over the years were literally right in front of us. ALL of the women that sat at that table had Endometriosis and their own story to accompany their diagnoses. [an automatic connection if you yourself have Endo and know how it goes.] i was shocked. i sat next to the sweetest gal, Kimee. wife to Austin. mama to 3 sweet babies. Kimee and i talked and talked about life, about hard stuff and beautiful stuff and the in between. it was refreshing and eye opening and oh so sweet.
another God wink: Austin, Kimee’s husband, we learned is a realtor. of course God placed a realtor at our dinner table. i mean, talk about an open door. we’d shared briefly with Austin [and the rest of the table] that we were open to the idea of moving to TX and joked that we might just be in contact sooner than later. little did we know…!
after great conversation and dinner, we danced the night away with our new friends. we sang at the top of our lungs, laughed, and celebrated mutual friends we all love so much. [thanks for sharing your friends with us, Connie + Alexandra!]
after it all, Matt and i hopped in the car and drove the hour home from the reception. we chatted about how good it was to be surrounded by people that felt like life-long friends. to share true Faith with one another. we chatted about the openness we’d agreed to during our trip to TX in March. we gave it all back to Him and lifted up a prayer: if You want this for us, make it clear + we’ll take action.
[putting this here just so i never forget. the next morning we went to Mass and this group of friends were at Mass, too. they joined us in our pews and then invited us out to brunch with them afterward. it was another handful of hours that God spent opening our hearts to the idea that Texas is where He wanted us, and great people already awaited our arrival...]
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mid-April rolled around and in our hearts we were becoming increasingly moved by the idea of moving. yet we had some big stones that first needed to be rolled away: Matt needed a job in Texas and we needed to find Callan a school we loved. we celebrated Matt’s 33rd birthday on the 26th - his Jesus year! - and closed out the month of April wondering what might come next.
on May 1st i wrapped up my consecration to St. Joseph - it was the Feast of St. Joseph the Worker and i had a few specific intentions: 1. that St. Joseph would cover us in prayer as we continued to discern a possible move. 2. if doors continued to open, Matt would find the work necessary that would allow for a move. 3. that Matt’s upcoming trial would be settled.
it’s not lost on me that my consecration day was on the Feast of St. Joseph the Worker…! he’s really led the charge with this all.
by the second week of May we were very open to the idea of moving, and wanted to plan a “business trip” out to the Dallas area to do a couple things in particular: look at neighborhoods we might love and check out schools for Cal. [Cal was already enrolled in a school WE LOVED here in CO, so i was super hesitant and seriously doubted that we’d find another school we loved as much] it was a weekend trip we both knew would either solidify our discernment and lead us to move, or turn out to be a closed door because we hated what we saw LOL.
the holdup? Matt was scheduled to go to trial for 2 weeks from May 6-17th. we didn’t have a free weekend in which we could make the trip out, so we offered it all back to Him and let go of the rest.
we went on with daily life, open to the possibility, but were out of action steps to move us forward. Matt was in full-swing trial prep mode, we were wrapping up Cal’s pre-school year, and sitting in the hallway for the millionth time in our married life, it felt. we’d shared all of this with our marriage counselor, Phil, and he said something that stuck with us both: “it sounds like God simply wants you to prepare the field in anticipation of the rain that’s going to come. all you have to do is that - prepare for rain. He’ll do the rest. He’ll bring the rain.”
St. Joe’s gentle assurance kept me sane. perseverance, patience, humility, trust, surrender…all virtues i told him to help me grow in. and here was my chance, yet again. prepare for rain, i thought to myself. God will lead us to our next steps when it’s time…
as we approached Matt’s trial week, i was legit asking everyone who’d pray to pray that Matt’s trial would settle. one, because trial is just stressful in general, and two, because it would free up a weekend that we didn’t anticipate having to actually fly to Dallas for our “business trip” weekend.
you probably already know where this is going…the Wednesday before trial was set to start: trial settled. a complete and total miracle to say the least - both Matt and i had resigned ourselves to the fact that trial was inevitable. lo and behind - we suddenly had 2 free weekends.
we were still stuck with Matt’s work situation in Denver, though - we needed to find something in Dallas. one of the biggest miracles along the journey has been this: Matt had a conversation with his boss and let him know that we were considering a move to Texas. “i’d rather you stay at the firm and work remotely than leave the firm at all.” was Matt’s boss’ response. [are you kidding me?!] Matt had the green light to work remotely from Texas. the Board at the firm okay’d this, too. what!!!
all of this meant: we had the green light to truly do this thing. miracle after miracle…
we booked flights to Dallas for May 17th-21st, a weekend we wouldn’t have had had trial not settled. thank you, St. Joe!
exactly 2 months after we told God we were open to the possibility of moving to Texas, we were back in Texas for our “business trip.” we drove through neighborhoods, we toured a couple schools, we went to Mass at St. Ann’s. [another side note so i never forget - we knew all of our friends were parishioners at St. Ann’s and had wanted to check it out for some time. i finally googled it just to see who the parish priest was. turns out that i know him from from my NET days - insert the sobbing emoji here - WHAT ARE THE CHANCES?! i reached out to Fr. Edwin via FB messenger [LOLOLOLLLL] and reconnected. another God wink, for sure.]
what more is there to say? we loved our trip to the Dallas area. we drove through neighborhoods with gorgeous mature trees, saw homes that met our checklists and ALSO fell well within our budget: in an area we desired to be in AND close to community, too. prayers answered! we found a school we love for Callan. we attended Mass at St. Ann’s and met up with Fr. Edwin. i ran into old friends that i’d not seen in FOREVER right outside of Church [again, what are the chances?!] we spent time with the group of friends i’ve mentioned a million times above, attended a crawfish boil at their parents’ home, met up with Austin to chat about what we are looking for in a home, etc. it was a busy, jam packed trip - and it was clear.
by the time we were flying home, both Matt and i knew.
we are moving to Texas.
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it’s been a whirlwind to say the very least. our home went on the market last Thursday and was under contract in 24 hours. another answered prayer. we couldn’t have prayed for a better offer - one that included a 2 week close and our full asking price. SO - we close on our house in exactly a week from today, on the 28th. we’ll rent back our home for the month of July and our official “hand the keys over” date is August 1st at 11am. pending all continues to go smoothly, that’s the plan.
we leave for a family trip, just the three of us, on Sunday morning and don’t get back until after we’ve closed. [how crazy is it that technology allows us to sell a house from afar?!] it’s odd because as i type this, we’ve already lived our last week in our home as it’s owners. that makes me tear up.
we’ll be back in Texas from July 8-10th to house shop and - God willing - come back to Denver under contract in Texas.
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my closest friends continue to ask: how are you doing, Shal? and you know, i’m a million things at once.
excited. sad. anticipating what’s to come. grieving what we thought life would always look like here in CO. trusting God’s miracles, one by one, as they continue to come. impatient to get there and be settled + simultaneously wanting more time here before it’s time to leave. missing our family that lives here already and we haven’t even left yet. looking forward to being near to my parents. heartbroken to leave so many friends we love here. ready to cultivate and dig into the community there.
it’s an odd in between. but isn’t that just it? isn’t life always some sort of both/and?
and i think it really is in the both/and that we are able to truly lean into growth in virtue, in realizing the true gift life and all it holds is. the both/and have been the beginning for so much growth in our lives.
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the biggest lessons we’ve learned over the past 3 months are these:
🌱 give God permission to surprise you + He will
🌱 blessings a l w a y s follow obedience
🌱 the easier option isn’t always the best one for you
🌱 we are pilgrims on earth, Heaven is our true home
🌱 God trusts y o u + He desires you to trust Him, too
🌱 never stop dreaming big or praying big
🌱 don’t hesitate to follow the nudges of the Holy Spirit, you will never be led astray
i could go on and continue to dig into the minutia of it all - but i’d rather this not be where i begin to write a book LOL
what i’d love to leave you with, aside from our lessons learned above is this:
keep going. keep praying. keep BELIEVING.
believe has been the word that continues to greet me each day lately.
Matt and i were chatting this morning about it all: we either believe, or we don’t.
we either believe that God plants dreams in our hearts, or we don’t.
we either believe God is who He says who He is, or we don’t.
we either believe that we were created for more than just comfort, or we don’t.
we either believe that our prayers are heard, or we don’t.
we either believe that God is working all things out for our good, or we don’t.
we either believe we have a role to play in His creation story, or we don’t.
while we live in the both/and, the in between doesn’t apply to our belief. we BELIEVE that in the both/and - God remains beside us as we process our realities, open ourselves to possibility, and take small steps forward with deep and abiding trust in what’s to come.
B E L I E F - it leads to new life, always.
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over the past 7 years, we’ve seen God work miracles in our lives both as individuals and as a married couple. when we have given God even a sliver of openness, He has worked with it and it’s been enough for Him to bring complete and total transformation into our lives. it’s who He is. He meets us in the small slivers of openness we can offer, embraces our apprehension and hesitancies, and loves us into newness at a pace that we alone set. He is never forceful or pushy. He simply asks, “will you let Me show you?” and waits patiently until our answer is “yes.”
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where in your life might God be asking you to be open? whether it’s in the big or small or in between, commit to believing more and more. prepare the field. believe that God will do the rest - He will bring the rain.
and the field - it will bloom in His perfect time.
God, we believe, help our unbelief. [Mark 9:24]